Not a hugely prolific year for this blogger suffering from a little writer’s block, but thank to the 3,000 of you who passed by!
Here’s an excerpt:
A San Francisco cable car holds 60 people. This blog was viewed about 3,000 times in 2013. If it were a cable car, it would take about 50 trips to carry that many people.
Having been silent for over three months, I prepare to write again.
About what, I have no idea. I think I have to go get a life.
It’s been so long that I accidentally logged into Blogger instead of WordPress. Now that’s saying something.
Pat Ingoldsby is an Irish phenomenon. Poet and playwright, people of my generation also knew him from his children’s TV programmes such as Pat’s Hat.
His poetry is wonderful: simple and honest, the poems vary from hilariously funny to painfully sad. He is one of my favourite poets, and my favourite of his books is called “Welcome to my Head: Please Remove your Boots”.Ten or so years ago, Pat withdrew from the Irish mass media. He set up his own publishing company, Willow Publications, and appointed his cats to positions of authority such as CEO and Head of Accounts. He sells his books through a small number of bookstores in Ireland, and also sells directly to the public on the streets of Dublin.
His books carry a note that they are protected by the “Bratislava Accord 1993, section 2 cre/009 manifest-minsk”, the terms of which allegedly protect his book’s content from being included in school textbooks, examinations, elocution classes or anything with the word “Arts” in it.
My mother and I came across him on the corner of O’Connell Bridge in Dublin, when I was over there in October. He was sitting on an upturned milk-crate with his books laid out in front of him. In his trademark Drizabone coat and wide-brimmed hat, he looked comfortable watching the world hurry by. I was star-struck: “That’s Pat Ingoldsby!” I whispered to my mum over the traffic noises. I tried not to stare too much as we walked past to cross the bridge. Then I came to my senses, and retraced my steps.
Shyly I stood before him, pretending to look at the titles of his books. He caught my eye and I asked if he had a copy of “Welcome to my Head”. We got talking and I told him I was a huge fan. He was such a lovely, gentle man, speaking about his books as if they were his children. I introduced myself to him and he said “God, I’m delighted to meet you Máiréad”.
He was charming to my mum. When I told him she was about to celebrate her 80th birthday, he gallantly told her she only looked 64 (later she complained he was three years out as the lowest number she’d been quoted so far was 60).
I bought one of his books and he signed it for me. Mum took a photo of us standing there on Westmoreland Street, and I shook his hand and said goodbye.
If this had happened to me after 25 October, it would certainly have been included in my 40 Amazing Things To Do This Year. But it was about ten days too early. I will have to include it in the Twenty Or So Amazing Things I Did Last Year.
Yesterday I participated in the Williamstown Literary Festival. On stage. As a competitor.
I didn’t mean to: I thought I had volunteered to read out some other person’s work, but apparently I had put my name forward to read my own piece. Later it was further clarified that I would be reading out my offering as part of the People’s Choice Awards, to be voted on by the audience on the day.
I spent the day at the festival, sitting in on lectures and workshops. The “Writing Food” talk by a local celebrity chef got the gourmet juices flowing, and now three of his books are on my must-have list. I was ravenous afterwards.
The “Sassy In The City: Writing The Modern Woman” lecture was given by a beautiful young romance writer with glossy curls, a great handbag and a handsome man waiting in the wings for her. Even though she was talking romantic fiction I got quite a few tips from her experiences. A couple of very elderly ladies in tweed and tight curls sat in the front row and muttered quietly to each other, shaking their heads and wondering aloud who this Bridget Jones was that the writer kept referring to.
Back in the Meeting Room of the Mechanics Institute, the wooden plaques around the room lauded past presidents of the Ancient Order of Druids and past Grands of the institute itself. A small group collected for the People’s Choice Awards and eleven local writers, myself included, stood and read out their personal pieces. I was the youngest entrant by far, except perhaps for the fresh-faced writer of teenage books whose perfect skin and long glossy auburn hair would have made me envious were he not a bloke.
One of the front-row ladies from the Sassy lecture, a sprightly 80-year-old local woman, stood and read a beautiful and poignant recollection of a Scottish friend, written for his funeral. A younger woman in grey snakeskin drainpipes gave a spirited rendition of her perfectly phrased and rhymed epic poem about the Aussies’ favourite horse, Phar Lap. A fashionably-dressed silver-haired woman from the University of the Third Age read out a lovely and amusing piece written from the point of view of a bonsai with a high opinion of itself.
My turn came. I stood at the top of the class, it seemed, and read out a version of my Chengde story from China. I was nervous and I know my voice shook a little at times. It is so different when you are seeking validation of your own words: I might as well have been standing there pleading for them all to like me.
I didn’t win of course: the bonsai lady deservedly picked up the first prize. Early this morning when I awoke I realised I’d had no chance – I didn’t even give myself top marks in the vote. I had misread the instructions and on my own ballot paper I had placed myself third, beneath the bonsai woman and a fellow writers’ group entrant.
Maybe next year.
Imagine your child, your god-child, or perhaps a child you know will become the leader of the free world, can only ever read ten books in their lifetime. What would those books be?
Thanks to all who contributed to the experiment. I received some wonderful lists from people, many of whom also gave their reasons why they chose the books.
In the end, we didn’t have a full top ten. There was a handful of books who were nominated a number of times, and a clear number one book. But the rest of the books nominated make such a great collection that I have listed them all here. Click here to buy any or all of the Top Eight from Amazon. Enjoy!
Number 1 – four votes
Animal Farm by George Orwell
Nominated by:
Nick Lawrance
“Read this book firstly as a fairy tale”
“Then to be read a second time immediately after The Communist Manifesto by Karl Marx, as an allegory of how power corrupts and all that”
Mairead Doyle
“This book can be read again and again in life to appreciate its many layers”
Katea Downie
Joint 2nd
Nineteen Eighty-Four by George Orwell
Nominated by:
Manu Pillai
Katea Downie
Mairead Doyle
“The ultimate cautionary tale for our times”
Joint 2nd
The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night Time by Mark Haddon
Nominated by:
Nick Lawrance
“Because mental health problems are just health problems”
Eileen Kershaw
Mairead Doyle
Joint 4th
All Quiet on the Western Front by Erich Maria Remarque
Nominated by:
Sam Evans
“Read this book and you won’t have a great view of humanity; like no other book it reveals the human cost of wars and why they should never be fought”
Mairead Doyle
“Probably the best war book ever written”
Joint 4th
Cloudstreet by Tim Winton
Nominated by:
Bres
“A modern Australian flavour”
Sam Evans
“An Australian masterpiece, amazingly written book about two poor families in western australia that suffer catastrophies but live on – wonderful use of Australian rural language”
Joint 4th
Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen
Nominated by:
Katea Downie
Katharine Haines
Joint 4th
To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee
Nominated by:
Katea Downie
Mairead Doyle
“A powerful story about growing up in an imperfect world”
Joint 4th
The Art of Happiness by the Dalai Lama
Nominated by:
Manu Pillai
Sam Evans
“Helped me get perspective – I think I’ll need to re-read this every few years to keep its messages fresh”
Other Nominated Books (Title, Author, Nominated by)
100 Years of Solitude
Gabriel Garcia Marquez
Suzanne Parsons
A Shropshire Lad
AE Housman
Katharine Haines
A Well Dressed Gentleman’s Pocket Guide
Oscar Lenius
Orlando Gibson
Anna Karenina
Leo Tolstoy
Sam Evans
Art of War
Sun Tzu
Manu Pillai
Between You & I
James Cochrane
Orlando Gibson
Bhowani Junction
John Masters
Hayley Burchill
Bible
Reference
Lesa Campbell
Black Beauty
Anna Sewell
Louise Beechey
Black Dogs
Ian McEwan
Bres
Bonjour Tristesse
Francoise Sagan
Katharine Haines
Brave New World
Aldous Huxley
Manu Pillai
Bridge to Terebithia
Kathrine Patterson
Alison Crimmins
Brotherman
Herb Boyd & Robert Allen
Orlando Gibson
Captain Correlli’s Mandolin
Louis de Bernieres
Louise Beechey
Catch 22
Joseph Heller
Nick Lawrance
Catcher in the Rye
J D Salinger
Katea Downey
Change the World
Robert E Quinn
Dean Campbell
Computer Programming for Dummies
Reference
Orlando Gibson
Crime & Punishment
Fyodor Dostoevsky
Louise Beechey
Danny, Champion of the World
Roald Dahl
Nick Lawrance
Definitely Atlas Shrugged
Ayn Rand
Alison Crimmins
Dracula
Bram Stoker
Nick Lawrance
Elizabeth – Red Rose of the House of Tudor
Kathryn Lasky
Kathryn Fridman
Endurance
Alfred Lansing
Sam Evans
Famous Five or Secret Seven
Enid Blyton
Eileen Kershaw
Fast Food Nation
Eric Schlosser
Katharine Haines
Howl’s Moving Castle
Diana Wynne Jones
Kathryn Fridman
I Capture the Castle
Dodie Smith
Katharine Haines
I, Coriander
Sally Gardener
Kathryn Fridman
If This Is A Man
Primo Levi
Katharine Haines
In Praise of Slow
Carl Honore
Katharine Haines
In Spain
Ted Walker
Annette Doyle
Journey to the River Sea
Eva Ibbotson
Kathryn Fridman
Les Miserables
Victor Hugo
Louise Beechey
Lord of the Rings
J R R Tolkien
Sam Evans
Lyn: A Diary of Prostitution
Lyn Madden
Annette Doyle
Maid of Buttermere
Melvyn Bragg
Louise Beechey
Martin and Malcolm and America
James H Cone
Orlando Gibson
Master and Commander
Patrick O’Brien
Hayley Burchill
Mayor of Casterbridge
Thomas Hardy
Louise Beechey
Midnight’s Children
Salman Rushdie
Mairead Doyle
Mr God This Is Anna
Finn
Mairead Doyle
Northern Lights
Philip Pullman
Kathryn Fridman
Noughts and Crosses
Malorie Blackman
Mairead Doyle
On Her Majesty’s Secret Service
Ian Fleming
Nick Lawrance
Oxford English Dictionary
Reference
Orlando Gibson
Parade’s End
Ford Madox Ford
Hayley Burchill
Pilgrim’s Progress
John Bunyon
Hayley Burchill
Pole to Pole
Michael Palin
Katharine Haines
Puffin Book of Utterly Brilliant Poetry
Various
Louise Beechey
Rachel’s Holiday
Marian Keyes
Annette Doyle
RHS Gardening Manual
Reference
Hayley Burchill
Romeo and Juliet
William Shakespeare
Katea Downey
Schindler’s Ark
Thomas Kenneally
Mairead Doyle
Sophie’s World
Jostein Gaarder
Bres
Teach Yourself Chinese
Reference
Orlando Gibson
Teach Yourself Spanish
Reference
Orlando Gibson
The Butcher Boy
Patrick McCabe
Annette Doyle
The Communist Manifesto
Karl Marx
Nick Lawrance
The Constant Gardener
John le Carre
Suzanne Parsons
The Five People You Meet in Heaven
Mitch Alborn
Bres
The Horse Whisperer
Nicholas Evans
Annette Doyle
The Kite Runner
Khaled Hosseini
Suzanne Parsons
The Lady Grace Mysteries – Assassin
Patricia Finney
Kathryn Fridman
The Lonely Planet – India
Lonely Planet
Annette Doyle
The Lost World of the Kalahari
Laurens van der Post
Katharine Haines
The Mousehole Cat
Antonia Barber
Louise Beechey
The New York Trilogy
Paul Auster
Bres
The Once and Future King
T H White
Katharine Haines
The Piano Tuner
Daniel Mason
Hayley Burchill
The Prophet
Kahlil Gibran
Annette Doyle
The Reader
Bernard Schlink
Nick Lawrance
The Silent World
Jacques Cousteau
Louise Beechey
The Star of Kazan
Eva Ibbotson
Kathryn Fridman
The Treatment
Mo Hayder
Annette Doyle
The Worlds of Chrestomanci – The Magicians of Capriona
Diana Wynne Jones
Kathryn Fridman
Time Bandits
Michael Palin & Terry Gilliam
Orlando Gibson
Twinkle Annual
–
Eileen Kershaw
Veronika Decides to Die
Paul Coelho
Annette Doyle
Vile Victorians (Horrible Histories)
Terry Deary
Kathryn Fridman
Voyage of the Dawn Treader
C S Lewis
Nick Lawrance
Winnie the Pooh – Complete Collection of Poems and Stories
A A Milne
Mairead Doyle
Women’s Room
Marilyn French
Annette Doyle
Máiréad Doyle 